Wed

06

Jan

2010

Why men need to learn ‘pick-up’ techniques
8 readers recommended
Why men need to learn ‘pick-up’ techniques

In a perfectly normal world men do not need to learn ‘pick-up’ lines and women make up their minds on whether to sleep with or not with a guy they have met based entirely on his personality, how it makes them feel and whether they like what he says.

Fast forward to the now and we all know that this is not quite the way things happen. Too many men are endearing, genuine, honest, caring and alone, too many women make decisions based entirely on the wrong reasons and end up sleeping with and getting hurt by the ‘wrong’ man.

You may want to know why and dearly I would love to tell you exactly but the truth is I can’t or rather I can’t tell you in a way which will allow you to lean and never make any mistake yourself. The truth is that although both men and women feel they need to connect at a genuine level, both sexes are engaged in a ‘game’ which allows them to live a kind of fantasy of their sense of each other.

While the ordinary reality of their lives means that we are each, clerks, secretaries, programmers and sales people, looking for a little love and a sense of companionship, in our minds we want James Bond and C.J. Parker (Pamela Anderson’s Baywatch character) to get it on at the local bar and experience mind-blowing sex as the beginning of a wild, mutually satisfying adventure.

It is at this point exactly where the plain-Janes and genuine guys lose out to the vamps and the polished pick-up artists who seem to have all the fun. The fact is that the vamps are not representative of women as a whole anymore than semi-professional womanizers are representative of the male population. Meeting someone you like, having sex with them (if that’s what you both want) and exploring the option of whether your time together is a little bit of diversional, mutually enjoyable fun or something deeper which you may both want to extend to the rest of your lives, should be the prerogative of everyone not just those who have happened to have polished their pick-up skills.

This is where the need comes for every man (and even some women) to have a grasp of the basics of the way the two sexes interact when it comes to what I shall coyly call the mating dance. While we value honesty and transparency we also need to understand how our minds work. It is only by understanding the differences between the sexes, why women think differently and what we think about that men can then get inside our heads enough in order for them to get us to spend time with you, sleep with you and, even, stay with you.

The end result is a plus gain for both sexes. By learning what makes us tick men stand a much better chance at scoring with us and by scoring with us we also get to know more men than just the ‘bad boys’ destined to break our hearts.

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A genetic imperative exists for decent guys to learn how to tap into women's fantasies in a playful way, so that wombs won't go to waste breeding the offspring of dissolute cads.
Nigel Harris , January 06, 2010
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Pick up lines will be around for ever. Now you have to make up your mind to fall for it or walk. I would rather has someone speak to me as a person than as a piece of meat. Flirting is ok but you know if the person in front of you is wanting you or a piece of ass for the night.
Doris , January 06, 2010

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